Mamassage

inspiration

Some days I feel that my blog is just not hard hitting enough. Or perhaps it is simply too specialized. In either case, perhaps I should take my example from these fine folks. After all, their tagline is:

Because you don’t get much more universal than that.

organ humor

Chris, on the phone with my sister today, was discussing the regional predominance of snow-birds and our possibilities for house sitting.

“Yeah,” he said. “There are all these migrant livers”

All I could think was, Is that anything like a transient kidney?

dumping the white stuff

nice lady

Guess who I just got off the phone with.

 

Just guess.

 

Give up?

 

Running2Ks...Yippee!!!

It was really good to hear from her.  We talked about kids, politics & religion. You know, the usual. I soaked up a couple of her new recipes and thought of some great Indian food ones I’d like to send off for that husband of hers. Apparently, he’s had quite the yen for the spicy stuff lately.

And if you were wondering whether or not she will be coming out of blogging retirement, I seriously doubt it. She sounded just as busily fulfilled as always. I swear that woman’s mind moves at lightening speed. I wish I could do that. But, you know, I’m just out here moving along with the pace of the seasons.

Running2Ks is still writing, too. She’s got some great articles coming up in her local newspaper. Can you think of anyone better suited for an editorial piece? I’d be hard pressed to do so.

I really enjoyed our conversation. I even promised to call back soon. And if you know me, you know how dreadful I am at correspondence. But this time I will. I just need to compile a few good Asian recipes first.

Desert Snowfall

I awoke this morning to the sweet, unsullied majesty of a first snow.  It was early still.  No one else had wandered out to look around.  So I quickly dressed and grabbed the camera, running outside to capture as much of the magical beauty as I could.

And while I know that many of you out there have been contending with snowstorms all winter, my nostalgia lingers.  It sets upon my heart like a soft blanket wrapping me in the memories of childhood, to keep me warm as I traipse through something so unexpected and evanescent as snowfall in the desert.

THE REVIEW

Well I made the mistake of submitting my URL to one of those snarky sites that rates your blog. I honestly hoped that I’d get some good, objective feedback about my design. And I did get some of that.  I’m really thankful to the people who told me to clean up my sidebars. I’ve known that I should do that for a while, but it’s so easy to get irrationally attached to funny little buttons and such.

Also, to the people who told me that red font on an apple green background is ugly...yep, I know. That was just a residual from when my dad suddenly lost most of his sight in January. There are simply some things that haven’t yet been attended to. It’s the same story with the huge font that so thoroughly offended some of you. It is also a throwback to the time before my dad purchased software that would enable him to once more keep tabs with his granddaughters.

I’ve seen your design feedback. I am absorbing it, and will continue to work at making my site more aesthetically pleasing. I do thank you for the critique of my format. Really, I do.

What shocked the hell out of me; however, were the people who were rude for no apparent reason other than the fact that we will never meet in person. Dear heavens, what a bunch of jerks. I had people calling me a freak because I had a water birth/labor. I had people calling me a freaky freak because I wrote about it. And I had people (and I use that term loosely) freaking themselves out over a sliver of my low back being exposed in the photo that I included when documenting that memory.

I further got to read the critiques of people who feel that I am a hypocrite because their perception of me as a “granola” hippie was crushed by photos of Kajsa wearing a disposable diaper. Holy cow. What a swarm of alarmists.

I never knew that blogging could be so rude. Naïve little me. I thought it was a great tool for connecting with like minds. And up until now it has been.

I have, through my reflection of those comments, come to an even greater appreciation of my blogging friends. And you know what?  I don’t feel bad at all that there are enough of you to crowd my sidebars.

BROKEBACK OLYMPICS?

You never do know what you’re going to find online these days.
BEWARE – watching this with teen-age offspring might make you blush.
Perhaps ice skating cowboys will be a new Olympic sport by 2008.
I’m getting images of rodeo clowns skating to Judy Collins.

IT'S A DRY HEAT

• You notice your car overheating before you drive it.
• You no longer associate bridges or rivers with water.
• You know a swamp cooler is not a happy hour drink.
• You can hear the weather forecast of 115 degrees without flinching.
• You can be in the snow, then drive for an hour...and it will be over 100 degrees.
• You discover, in July it only takes two fingers to drive your car, because your steering wheel is so hot.
• You can make sun tea instantly.
• You run your a/c in the middle of winter so you can use your fireplace.
• The best parking is determined by shade.....not distance.   In fact, you are willing to park 3 blocks away because you actually found shade from a palm tree imported 300 miles from California and nurtured with water piped 250 miles from Nevada. 
• You realize that "Valley Fever" isn't a disco dance.
• Hotter water comes from the cold water tap than the hot one.
• It's noon in July, kids are on summer vacation and yet all the streets are totally empty of both cars and people.
• You actually burn your hand opening the car door.
• Sunscreen is sold year round, kept right at the checkout counter.
• You put on fresh sunscreen just to go check the mail box.
• Some fools will market mini-misters for joggers and some other fools will actually buy them. Worse.....some fools actually try to jog.
• You know hot air balloons can't rise because the air temperature is hotter than the air inside the balloon.
• No one would dream of putting vinyl inside a car.
• You see two trees fighting over a dog.
• You can say "Hohokam" and people don't think you're laughing funny
• You see more irrigation water on the street than there is in the Salt River
• You have to go to a fake beach for some fake waves
• You can pronounce"Saguaro", "Tempe", "San Xavier", "Canyon de Chelly", "Mogollon Rim", and "Cholla"
• You can fry an egg on the hood of a car IN THE MORNING!
• You feed your chickens ice cubes to keep them from laying hard-boiled eggs.
• You can understand the reason for a town named "Why"
• You hear people say "but it's a DRY heat!"
• You buy salsa by the gallon.
• Your Christmas decorations include sand and l00 paper bags.
• You think a red light is merely a suggestion.
• All of your out-of-state friends start to visit after October but clear out come the end of April.
• You think someone driving wearing oven mitts is clever.
• Most of the restaurants in town have the first name "El" or "Los."
• You think 60 tons of crushed red rock makes a beautiful yard.
• Your house is made of stucco and has a red clay tile roof.
• Vehicles with open windows have the right-of-way in the summer.
• Most homes have more firearms than people.
• Kids will ask, "What's a mosquito?"
• People who have black cars or black upholstery in their car are automatically assumed to be from out of-state or nuts.
• You know better than to get into a car with leather seats if you're wearing shorts.
• If you haven't worked for Motorola at some time, you must be a newcomer.
• You can finish a Big Gulp in 10 minutes and go back for seconds.
• You have to look up "mass transit" in the dictionary. 
• You've experienced condensation on your butt cheeks from the hot water evaporating in the toilet bowl.   
• You think Taco Bell is the local phone company. 
• A three-inch rain in Phoenix means three inches between drops. 
• You take rain dances seriously.
• A rainy day puts you in a good mood.

Welcome to Arizona, where summer spends the winter - and hell spends the summer. 
~Popular saying, modified from a booster slogan in the 1930s.

JESUS PETS

As seen on Texas Dave’s blog. 

I am thinking that this might just be the answer to all my financial prayers.

SHIZ-KNIT

You might find the item unsightly. But it is sheer beauty, when compared to the comments of others.

(Yes, Jen, I was thinking of you when I saw this.)